Q: Iím afraid my efforts to lose weight will hurt my marriage. Can you help?
A: Donít let your spouseís fear of change (or love of carbs) keep you from becoming healthier. Keep it collaborativeódonít get preachy. Remember that by taking care of yourself, youíre taking care of the relationship. These specific suggestions can help:
- Communicate honestly. Tell your partner what youíre trying to do, but donít expect immediate buy-in. You may be OK with having steamed veggies for dinner, but he or she may not feel the sameódonít push your agenda.
- Continue eating together, even if you and your spouse are eating different foods. Create something like a salad that you can enjoy together, and then you can each have your own entrťe.
- Try to be active together. If you are taking a walk on a weekend, ask him or her to come along, but donít guilt your partner into exercising.
- Donít do a cupboard purge without asking. Your better half is going to be angry if the goodies suddenly disappear.
óDr. Ramani Durvasula, Psychologist,†Professor, California State University,†Los Angeles
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